Posts Tagged With: body shaming

Focus on Being Healthy

Often I run across women in the grocery store, clothing store, and they are putting themselves down. I mean they are really digging in for the kill, “I am so fat. I am so ugly. I hate my body. Do you see this one wrinkle on my face. Oh man I am a troll. I wish I were skinnier. I wish I had her body. I wish I could be just like…(fill in some unrealistic expectation).

There is such a push in our society to be an airbrushed version of ourselves. I wonder often where the obsession with skinny and enhanced body parts came from. It’s okay if you are naturally thin. It’s also okay if you are not.

No one at our funerals will say, “They sure could have lost those last ten pounds.” It’s ludicrous to keep allowing the scale or a preconceived idea of beauty to stop you from enjoying life.

Love the body you are in and celebrate it. Say it with me, “I love my body.”

I was talking to a young lady who has always hated being a girl. Then she developed breast cancer. I told her, “You know hating yourself impacts your soul and your soul health impacts your natural (body) health.”

The body, soul, and spirit are connected. Sickness in one area impacts the others.

I knew of another lady who hated being female and she developed ovarian cancer. She hated being a girl. She died last year. She cursed her feminity with her words and cursed the gender given her at birth. Her self hatred manifested in her body.

Is all cancer the result of self hatred, no. Can our lack of love for who we are impact our bodies, absolutely.

There can also be copious amounts of time wasted on trying to be thin, skinny, get the last 10 pounds off that the joy of life is removed. I read an article a few weeks ago of a mom who died because she overdid it with protein consumption. Her pursuit of the “Perfect” body led her to the grave. What good is her “Perfect” body 6 feet under? Underground her body is rotting and decaying. Nothing but bones will lay in that grave. Her children will grow up without her. What good is skinny if you are dead?

Life is a gift! It may not always feel that way with the challenges, pressure, and pains of life. Yet life is a gift. Some people did not wake up this morning, or they have lost everything, or they are hanging on for dear life. What are we doing to enjoy life, really enjoy it! How are we focusing on being healthy…

Let’s talk about healthy life focus…

Healthy is more than meal plans and exercise. Healthy is taking care of ourselves, emotionally, and having our priorities straight.

What S.M.A.R.T (A SMART goal should be specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound) goals are you setting for yourself? What are you doing to get closer to your personal goals?

This year I stated I wanted to focus on some of my own goals. I have. I have lost 25 pounds. I traveled to the Grand Canyon (bucket list item). I finished the manuscript for my second book. I stopped investing in one sided relationships. I limit time with toxic people. I am working on my third book and hope to get in the recording studio in the next 12 months. I spoke at a regional women’s conference for the first time ever. I quit some volunteer jobs that were killing me.

I realized in most situations I am the responsible person. If someone needs help and it’s legitimate, I will try to help. I tend to put others first. Yet life requires balance. If you are putting others first and they are putting themselves first, guess what, you will be left depleted. They will leave you cleaning up messes, handling situations, and they will ride off into the sunset on holiday. They will have no problem telling you no, quitting, dropping the ball, yet you will be left a wreck with only yourself to blame. Boundaries baby boundaries.

Relationships were meant to be mutual blessings, not one sided blessings. Who constantly has their hand out and deposits nothing? That is not your friend.

We need to focus as much on our own goals as we do on the goals of others.

If you are that person always putting yourself first, this does not apply to you. If you are a giver and try to invest in others, this applies to you. Are you sacrificing your own health (mental, emotional, and spiritual) for others and ending up burned out? If so, reeval your priorities. Reassess your boundaries. You are not responsible for other people, unless it’s a small child, your child. Adults are to take care of their own lives.

“Selfishness is placing your wants above others needs. Self care is placing your needs above another’s wants.”

Who are you investing your time in for relationships? Why? Do those people even try to match your effort? Relationships are not about what we can gain. There is a problem if everyone connected to us has their hand out.

What things have you wanted to do that you put off doing? Can you pick those up again?

What is toxic in your life? What are you doing about it? Ask yourself is what you are doing today getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow? Then move in the direction of the best yes.

My hope is you pursue health. Pursue healthy in every facet of life.

To your health…

Erin L Lamb

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Say No to Body Shaming

Aloha fitness and wellness friends, 

Today I wanted to talk about something that I believe impacts lots of people. It is body shaming. 

Body shaming is refusing to love your body or trying to make others feel bad about their body. 

You see it on the internet. People troll others social media and make nasty comments. You see people trying to change what they look like through plastic surgery. You see people go to extremes to fit some mold that I am not sure who created. What is perfection? 

We have apps to airbrush away anything we see as an imperfection. 

Let me tell you, perfectionism is self abuse.

Perfectionism is rooted in the fear of not being good enough. It is a fruit of insecurity. It is a lie that if a person tries hard enough to be perfect they will not be rejected. It is a painful way to live. 


Yesterday I went shopping for clothes for a missionary friend (I do not enjoy shopping-unless it’s online-or gift for someone). Anywho, the ladies in the store spent 20 minutes talking about how they hated their bodies. Both were slim/average, yet they went on and on and on…

I noticed this trend with some women of not feeling good enough, beautiful enough, perfect enough, body shaming, hating something about themselves. 
I told them both I liked my body. They looked at me like I was some super wacko. Then they went on to talk about hating certain body parts that well I have more than they do in that area. 

My body not perfect, yet it gets the job done. It’s strong, man is it strong. It can box, kick box, krav maga, hold plank for several minutes, do push ups…it is healthy. I am healthy. Yet over the course of my life I have had people project body shame on me. 

One, I developed a curvy body pretty early on, maybe 14. I hated the way men looked at me. I grew ashamed of my curves, my coca cola shape and extra abundance in areas. I hated being sexualized. I was still a little girl, yet grown men were creepy and it made me want to hide my body. Even today, I hate being sexualized by men. 

I am an engineer/Research Scientist. I did an expo for my job a few weeks ago. I wore a dress, it covered everything up, it was professional. There were still men who came by and held conversations with my chest. They (my chest) do not talk. Some say men are wired this way. Yet I firmly believe it’s a lack of respect, self control, and viewing women as sex objects-our culture promotes it. 

I had to move past hating my body because men were being creepy. I also had to move past feeling less than from being around insecure women. You know the woman who is always insulting herself and you have the thing she is insulting herself about. She’s a size 4, you are a size 8 and she goes on for days about how fat she is. Gimmie a break!! It’s exhausting to deal with people who hate themselves. You have that one friend who has an inch of fat she keeps pinching and you want to scream, “Knock it off!!” 

Women talk about weight and appearance FAR, far, far more than men do. Why? Men can look like a train wreck and still think they are hot. Why are women constantly putting themselves down? Who started this trend? How can we kill it? 

God said I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Who argues with God? Jesus cannot lie. 

Ladies, that one inch of fat does not make you ugly

The ladies in the magazines, some, do not look like the photos. Photoshop and makeup are powerful. Trust me, I worked for Limited Brands. You can make anyone look amazing. Tools baby tools. 

I also work in a male environment, even when they don’t look good they are boasting about how awesome they are. They talk about how awesome they are. 

Some women put themselves down, while men (some) over exaggerate their qualities. Both need healthy confidence. Putting ourselves down and thinking more highly of ourselves than we should are both pride problems (extreme self focus). Both are vanity. 

Think of how much time is wasted criticizing oneself. What if we loved the bodies we are in and sought to make them as healthy as possible? How radical would that be! What if the focus was, “I love myself, therefore I eat healthy and workout“?

I will tell you shame does not produce a healthy life. It produces self destruction. Shame is hatred turned inwards. We were not created to hate ourselves or our bodies. We were created by God for love. Love sees the best. 

My encouragement is stop the body shaming. Ladies and gentlemen you are beautiful (handsome) right where you are. 

Homework: write on your bathroom mirror 

I am fearfully and wonderfully made!

Make positive body and self confessions. If you hear yourself degrading yourself or someone else, course correct and switch to love. Don’t worry about feelings. Feelings are not an indication of truth. Focus on feeding your mind truth and professing truth. Your feelings will catch up later! 

#saynotobodyshaming #loveyourself 

Photos pulled from Pinterest. 

Xoxo, 

Erin Lamb 

Categories: Emotional Health, Fitness, Mental Health | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Embrace Your Shape, Eat for Your Body Type

  
Hello fitness friends!

I hope you are doing well. I hope you are taking care of your body, soul, and spirit. All three need TLC (tender, loving care). 

Over the past few months I have been reading more articles on loving your shape, embracing your unique body, and working with what you’ve got. 

It brings such confidence to love the body we have, accept it, and seek to enhance/embrace what we have. 

We were not created or designed to look like everyone else. 

We are individuals, unique, and our structures are impacted by our DNA. We can cut, nip, tuck, modify, liposuction, starve, take suppliments, and seek to change the outside, yet health starts with loving who we already are. 

Once we love who we are, our shape, our genetic makeup, then we can seek to work with what we have been given. Healthy inside (soul-mind, will, emotions), leads to healthy outside. 

Example. I am curvy. I have been curvy since maybe 14. I hated that I was the girl who looked more like a woman than a girl. Why? Because boys and grown men looked at me in ways I did not like. 

We spend lots of time talking about how men are visual and women need to cover up, yet some things can not be hidden unless you wear parkas or tents. 

A young girl should not be shamed for something she has no control over. Even in modest clothes, some shapes can be seen. I am not stating all attire is appropriate. I am saying self control is something all should learn. Children are not sex objects. People were not created to be objectified, but to be loved-and love does not seek to take or reduce people to objects for pleasure. 

I so wanted to just be stick thin, no curves. Well, that did not happen. 

At 16 I started exercising more, wearing hockey jerseys, eating less…all attempting to be comfortable in my skin and to cease being sexualized by men. I wanted and still want to be a person, not a sex object. I recall and hear the things men state about women they are overly sexually drawn to. They do not care if she has a brain, is courageous, compassionate, etc…they just see one thing-a mean’s to get their fantasy met. I have heard many men (I work with mostly men) say women are only good for one thing, meaning sex/reproducing children. 

Why do I tell you this story? Because body shaming does not just happen to heavier people. It happens to thin, curvy, all shaped people. Body shaming is not okay. For us to do to ourselves or for others to do to us. I found I started gaining weight and loving not getting male attention, at least not lustful male attention. They actually looked me in the eye, treated me like a person, not eye candy. 

I also found I needed to love the body God gave me despite the reactions of other people. I am curvy, a mesomorph (more muscle than fat), strong, athletic, and I own the body I am in…meaning I love my body. 

  
Once you embrace your shape, eat for your body type. 

I learned that my body works best when it is given more protein than carbs. If I eat too many carbs I gain fat. If I eat more protein I lose fat. I have a fast oxidizing metabolism. I have included the test below so you can see what type of metabolism you have. 

Oxidizer Test  

What works best for you? It is not about a number on a scale or other’s approval. Do you love you? Do you eat for your health? Do you like you? Does your body respond well to what you are eating? If not, what can you change? 

Here is another resource for you. 

Master Your Metabolism
Maybe that high carb, low fat diet or meal plan is not working for you because your metabolism works best with high protein. Maybe the calorie restriction is not producing results because the fuel type, food you are giving your body is not the right kind of fuel. 

Whatever you do sweet friends, learn to love yourself. Love your shape, treat yourself with respect and honor. You are fearfully and wonderfully made! 

Xoxo, 

Erin 

Categories: Emotional Health, Fitness, Mental Health, Motivation, Nutrition | Tags: , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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